Xinhui Val
走路到纽约
Mr. X: 你不可能去的啦。做PA mebbe loh...take time-checks, buy lunch and coffee for super long before anything happens. 他们哪里会要你？
Nikky: I thought you always wanted to be幕前？
Edwin: Do it. You should. Yarh...before it's too late.
Preethi: Go for it man. You should...it's never the situation man, it's how you handle it.
Andrew: I can assure you that if you stay with us, 5 years down, you'd be earning more than any of your peers. But that's just money... and right this moment, what have you got to lose? You're at the right age to do this.
Tripti: Find out more. If you need help, we can go through this together, work it out step by step. Don't worry about failing your parents expectations, the last thing any parents want is an unhappy child. Trust me, if you'd gone ahead to med school, law school, engine school...they'd kick themselves knowing how unhappy their daughter is. Go for it, but be practical about it.
Mdm: All you need to know, is how much you want this. 我可以搭飞机到纽约 - 一下子就到了。。。但什么都没看到。我也可以走路到纽约 - 路途会很艰辛。。。但我会看到很多、受益更多。
Mr. X: I'm glad she painted such a beautiful picture for you. Cos I can tell you it's not gonna be anywhere close. It can get quite ugly. You won't be able to command the respect of the people. Who are you to make it, if so many have tried and fail? You have my utmost support going for the forefront, I think you're pro-ness for it...But this? You want to waste your life away, then do it. I just think it's not gonna work out. Go if you want, I'll support you...just be prepared to fail...and fail very badly.
妈：我知道为什么人家欣赏你。你的故事，是我的遗传。只是我没你好命都那么多书。。。你的作文，从小到大。。。我看了，我知道你可以的。 我一方面会很骄傲。。。因为我的女儿有幸做她想做的东西。我可以告诉我的朋友，这个是我的女儿做的！我的朋友都会说我好命，有个本事的女儿。但另一方面，身为父母，我们会很担心你的健康。想清楚，然后要好好努力、用功。。。不要给自己太大的压力、太高的要求。要开心。
爸：有这样好的事？你什么都不会、什么都不懂。谁对你那么有信心？你要去学photo吗？你想清楚了没有？出路和兴趣是不同的东西。。。去lor。。。没有得后悔的huh!
Mr. X：K la...even your parents support...you have my full support now. Do well!
有种莫名其妙似乎老天终于听到那位小女孩默默许下的使命 - 我要帮人家讲故事！第一次，有种“天宫疼呆仔”的幸福。
就剩下Friday那关了。我只想说。。。
Oops! *bleep*
Some of you may realized that my posts on the production have been removed. We were SMS-ed today that we have to keep the project hush hush until the telecast in order to protect copyrights, as well as the actual cases. So...
Apologies! The entries will be back after the telecast. So do make a date with us on 15 May 2008, 9.30PM at Channel U!
25th dinner at French Stall
I know I promised an entry on this, so here we go...Bon Appétit!
One of our appetizers was Escargots in Garlic Herb sauce. The first thing Mr. X said to me when they served the dish was, "Were you expecting them to come in shells? *smirks*" Super taboleh tahan his smug-ness hahas...I used to work in Fosters at Holland V, and I think he remembers me telling him about the superb escargots served in "fake shells". But no...the French Stall that serves authentic French Cuisine serves their escargots straight up, no frills ;P
It was Mr. X's first attempt at them snails, and perhaps he was a tad overwhelmed? All he managed was, "Taste abit like top-shells, don't you think?" Uhh...no? Hee... I really like the sauce tho - very herbish.
I've been craving and craving for the Army Market garlic bread but somehow, we never got to eating them again (we always manage to go down on their off-days...-_-") So when I saw Garlic Bread on their menu, I requested for them immediately hee! I have to say...perhaps I'm your gal-next-door after all. I still prefer the Army Market ones >.< 
Mr. X's entré was the Dory, which according to him, is a "Hungry Go Where must try!" I tell you, Hungry Go Where is like his bible for food places in Singapore. I liked the texture of the fish; I didn't fancy the flavor much tho...a tad too raw and fishy for me.
My entré! The "long long french name which means ribeye steak. I loved the done-ness (trust me, medium-rare can be hard to get right oh), and the sauce was definitely yummy! *droolz*
And last but not least...the dessert! Mr. X asked the waiter for differences between the recommended soufflé and this one. The waiter showed us their pics and Mr. X went like, "Ok, I want the big big one!" *grinz* I'm not the only one with a sweet tooth huh? I have to say, this one here is one of its kind - the vanilla ice-cream was reeeeeallllly goooooooood!
That's all from me for this dinner I think...been making some tough decisions lately, will catch up with yall soonz...!
Who?
Just spent the last 6 hours in complete solitude - no phone, no laptop, no nothing.
And realized...when I want someone to turn to, to just hide and confide in, to just burst into tears without having to give any answers...
There is no one available. The 6 hours felt like forever. I felt like I was trapped in the still of time. And as each second passes me by, the days have already flew past for the rest of the world.
For a "my time, alone time" gal...today's solitude has been painful and scary. The sudden realization of how alone I really am...is a wake up call I think.
I think...I have made my decision after all.
Summary of my post-production blues
Post-filming week is supposed to be the week of post-production blues hahas...when one suddenly realizes that there's no more rushing around, getting in and out of roles...where everything settles back into my corporate routine. Went back to the 360 Productions office last Sunday to view the editing process...and hopefully learn some stuff and keep some pointers for improvements next time.
Mr X said, "I always try to tag along editing...cos that's when you see yourself on film and that's when you learn." True true, acting for film is beyond being that person in the story. Things like camera angles, accommodating others, lighting, angles etc. play a huge role, too.
Take for example, there was this "staring shot" at the pool centre where Ah Bee and Cindy first met. Andrew and I had to drag that "split second when our eyes met" for like...forever? Ok lah, for 10secs. I dunno why we were doing that, and it was pretty hard to hold that "split second of anger with his brothers, caught his eyes, change to breathlessness of shyness" (yea, there are that many emotions in ONE star k...think about it, you'd agree too! hee...) for 10 friggin secs. If it's "split sec", the changing of emotions would've occurred naturally...if it's stretched for 10 secs...it became slightly very hard to grasp when to change from angry, to catch his eye, to shy...and yesh, both Andrew and I got it all wrong the first few times round. :(
But back in the editing room, Siang Hui Dao Yan explained to me, "I was trying to do some matrix shot...but it might have failed...nvm, we'll see how." Woah..."MATRIX shot?" Explain please? It's ala the movie "Matrix" - where the staring scenes always have this "Stare", "Register", and then "Zoom" past each other effect? I know it's a tad abstract, but try to visualize? That was WHY we had to hold our stares...for the "Zoom" to effect during editing! Wished I'd known these things...*fingers crossed* the shot was successful tho. We ain't no Hollywood I know, editing can only go so far I know...still...there's always room for crossed fingers and hopes no? ;P
After the editing session, Siang Hui Dao Yan proposed a life-changing offer. Won't be divulging too much...as I'm still in my decision-making phase...and it will have huge effects on my life in general I think. Monday's the day I speak to Tripti...a dash of her wisdom should do me some good here I think.
Aights, back to my week! Mr. X finally got down to fulfilling some of his, "I will..."s hahas...But lemme tell you why k? It's cos, poor me has to burn the midnight oil with the X-brothers at their hall in NTU while they mug for their chem papers and be their "wikipedia" for the night. Gosh, the last time I touched chem was what...6 years ago? Why they trust me I have no idea. So Mr. X, I assume outta gratitude and guilt *grinz* decided to finally get me my new helmet, with nice stickers to declare that the helmet is MINE (read: WH, do not attempt to wear my helmet the next time you get a ride...your hair does not smell like Ascience like mine; and i definitely do not want my hair to smell like a WH horzzz...Heh).
Presenting, MY new helmet, heehee...
Nice BIG bright pink flower on the right...
...and small pink flower thingy on the left! *Happy!*
Wa lau, the helmet does NOT (read: Mr X - NOT) at all prepped me for the latest "fetish" to come during my midnight oil stint can? While I was taking my 40 winks (eh, unlike the bros I did not sleep till 3-4ish in the afternoon; I woke up 7ish that morning to go to work okies?!?)...here's what bian tai Mr. X did to me:
K la, Mr. X made it up with a nice dinner at the French Stall on Fri night. That, I will award a separate entry with lotsa yummy looking photos! Hee!
Ah Bee Lao Gong
As requested by Mr. Andrew Xu Feng, who played the role of Cindy's Ah Bee Lao Gong, I'm putting a link to his blog here.
Read about him, his acting stints and his thoughts on being Cindy's Lao Gong there! *growls* He complained a lot...don't let me hear you complain in front of me arh. Else! *shows you fist*
Kazaf's entry on filming
Kazaf (one of the Ah Bengs from Day 1) wrote a pretty interesting entry on his filming experience. Thought I'll drop a quick line and share with everyone - it's here.
Thank you thank you!
*Touched* My phone started ringing at 6plus during my Indo classes. *Gosh* So I sneaked a peek on my lappie during the toilet break to see the results.
Kash is the official SG iTalentstar (yea now we can add the "star" behind heh)! Congrats my gal...I know you will go far! So do us proud k?
Which means I didn't win. I'm FINE everyone. Thank you for the calls, SMSes, constant checks etc. Yep, it meant a lot to me. Yep, I put in my all. Yep, sacrifices were made. Yep, I lost. But hey, I gained immensely, too. Gems like Gim and Mike are more than enough to last a life-time to begin with. Not to mention the experiences from training, launch event...and the making of the videos, too!
I don't wanna be too politically correct - yesh, tears were shed, frustrations were vent. It's normal right? After all, I gave my all. But I am fine. Really. Everyone needs to move on. I attempted. Had a shot at realizing my dreams one more time. A shot well made I believed. So...that's that.
Having said that, there are a lot of people I need to thank. Daddy for being so spontaneous...and Mummy for being less cynical. Bro for being...there, in your own eccentric yet heartwarming manner. My company for being so understanding and supportive. Andrew for being a great mentor and team-mate, both at work and for iTalentstar. Neo for his fantastic professionalism. Junwei and Alvin for being so accommodating on last minute notice. Lao Ban (Calvin) for being ever so ready to help. Fellow contestants for pushing me to acheive beyond my self-set limits. Tiffy...for your, "you'll always be my iTalentstar" - it helped me released my long held-back tears you know? *huggs* Friends and fans-turned-friends who have that much faith in me, and spared me your daily 5mins...I hope I've not let you down. And Mr. X...despite all that has happened, you are one person I know I'm nothing without...I know iTalentstar would have been much different without you and your trusty Phantom, creative cinematography, crappy ideas...comforting presence.
From the bottom of my heart - thank you thank you. *bows x 3*
I promise everyone here - it won't be the end (not that it's the beginning haha...) In fact, I'd be filming a Channel U series, "My World My Blog" this coming week. More details to come...so look out for it! *val's zhao pai grinz*
posted by Xinhui VaL on 13 April 2008 at 3:24 AM under filming, iTalentstar
The sweet taste of betrayal
I remember having the same fever you were having. I remember bringing ice-packs to hall for you b'cos it's dangerous to be alone with a fever.
I remember entering your room. And hearing you on the phone.
I hate myself for being smart. Too smart.
"两个人在一起，信任最重要" "I already try my best to earn it." "I've done more than enough to earn it."
Yupps. Chatting happily with Kaelyn when depressed is earning my trust. Going to Zouk with her behind my back also earns you brownie points I guess?
Well done Mr. X. Well done. What else have you not done, Mr. X?
I feel like a total Xiaowei now you know? And as you are on your way here...I hope I remain as calm as I am when I do see you.
Funky Grad Media Interview
Stefan from Funky Grad sent me the link to our media interview last night. So...here we go:
http://www.funkygrad.com/campus/displayarticle.php?artID=1066&subcat=rave
Just when we thought we're quite done with videos - they gave us a video interview and a creative challenge! Now, you know why the perturbed look on our faces at Starbucks. K lah, it wasn't that bad in the end...and here're some personal snapshots on that day!
SGF01 Xinhui VaL's creation outta Swenson's Ice Cream Fondue - kinda abstract, don't you think? *keke*
Mike totally enjoyed my creation, He said "Yummy!" k? Hee...but he ate his up before I could snap it :( 
Kash with her "Green Creation" - very her, full of values and lessons...P.S. 2 more days left to vote, so hurry! Vote once more each day for the next 2 days and make SGF01Xinhui VaL your SG Champion for iTalentstar k? Thankies!
posted by Xinhui VaL on at 9:58 AM under interview, iTalentstar, photoshoot
There's nothing to hide, anymore.
错误的开始，结局就一定是结束吗？
我算不上什么无辜的第三者，但也绝对不是处心积虑的介入者。。。就因为认识你的时候，你已有个她。我们的开始，是错误的。
一年后的我们，似乎回到了原点。我，站在她的角落。。。挣扎了、失败了。你就是如此的耀眼，我们却是如此的平凡 - 凭什么？
她曾经是公开公然的让你牵着，我似乎一开始就是一直躲着。被公认的她还是失去了你。。。我，凭什么？
不被公认是为我好。。。那公然被否认 - 痛。还是痛。你所谓的无底洞，不是我一个人在挖渠，也不是你一个人在填补。
我不知何时风、何时雨。。。不知什么时候可以坦然倾诉、什么时候得独自承受。我很想不去钻牛角尖，但困在围绕着你而生活的圈圈。。。无奈地害怕，害怕地无奈。
我认了。错误的开始，也只能用结束画上句点吧。
I'm not what it says
委屈max...
总是忍不住寂寞掉下眼泪 你才会给安慰
担心短暂的晴天 随时都可能被阴狸收回
等待 有机会最坏也最甜美
我乐观却疲惫
因为太怕失去你 所以连快乐里都装满伤悲
你不曾发觉你总是用右手牵着我
但是心却跳动在左边
你和我之间的遥远永远隔着亲切爱少的可怜
伸出右手想陪着你向前走
感受你爱我的心跳在左边
那么深深爱你的我
想信你会了解
总在埋怨过你的冷漠之后 又急着说抱歉
仿佛向疏远的你乞求一点体贴 都是我不对
结果 有可能最美也最可悲
我做好了准备
也许太自由的你 心里面那个家谁也不能回
我一直相信总有一天你会用左手 牵着我走向明天
未来很遥远 却会实现
心在同一边就能够听见 你说的那句
我爱你
iTalentstar semi-finals prep work has been done. Time for me to fulfill my promise of walking away. To think we actually get to "announce" it to the world. Well... he gets to announce it, at least. And his version, his way, too.
No matter. Brand new VaL to brave the world! *smiles*
iTalentstar semi-finals entry - make me your Singapore Champion!
Singapore's People/Culture - Past, Present, Future
Singapore's Food/Places Part I
Singapore's Food/Places Part II (Bonus Video)
iTalentstar semi-finals rally video
Got into the semi-finals le...did the rally video le...and realized that the semi-finals start in less than 7 hours' time!
10 years is a pretty long time for dreaming, ain't it? *fingers crossed* that I make it through. Must go and bai bai - the black sheep me made it this far. Must make it through ok ok?
Many thanks to the people who've been rallying around me, rallying their friends and family for me. I do hope that you guys will enjoy my semi-finals video, as much as I've enjoyed bringing it to you guys!
A beautiful sunset...a brand new me!
Hello! Felt like I needed to say, "Hello!" after not posting for a couple of days. My tag board is active! Haha... *touched*
I'm officially down to my last dosage of medication, and officially...feverless! This week of sleeping, medication, lotsa water has been good for me I guess. I do feel some sorta rejuvenated *keke*
Went for the Tatarah "Babe of the month" photo shoot yesterday and surprised a few people. Myself, to begin with - I never knew I was able to portray the kind of look-n-feel the photographers wanted me to. Woot! Over the photoshoot, I seemed to found an undiscovered, almost "wild" side of me lolx...no more so sweetie-pie eh? May the make-up artiste was surprised that I warmed up to the camera so soon, too. I think she meant that as a compliment no? Heehee... am actually quite curious which photo would Tatarah choose, out of the 6 shortlisted ones. Will post a notice when it's out, so look out for it! :)
A little sneak-preview to my hair and make-up for the photoshoot *grinz*:
Amazing, I managed to get the clips for iTalentstar shot on time. So it was off to the editor, Kin's house yesterday after my shoot. He was really nice to let me "tag along" beside him and "learn" on the job! To think that he never had any training his whole life - some pro-ness editing skills! Can't wait for the end-products...muahaha.
Saw this beautiful sunset after the editing session at Kin's (I know, the photo didn't so any justice to the breathtaking view at all). It came after a huge downpour...kinda reminded me of the situation(s) I've got into these days... Hopefully, "As the sun sets, a different world comes to life" - "As this sun sets, a brand new Xinhui VaL shall be invented."
Down down down...
Ever wanted something to go down down down...? Prices? Expectations?
My temperature!!!
Sorry, just had to yell at someone right now. Was supposed to get well in 24 hours' time, no?
"oh, no worries about the fever...the infection gets into your bloodstream and you get the fevers...it's rhythmic."
The last I checked...rhythmic = dance/music.
K k...I was a bio student, I know. Sorry...I just hate the ups and downs of feeling feverish, then ok to conquer the world...then feverish again. 35.5 (I know, I'm a freak...they always have to check my temp 3 times during SARS cos I was too cold...I can't help it if my norm temp is lower than everyone else k?), 36.5, 37.5, 38.5, 39...If I start plotting the temps on a graph, I think I will get a very nice "rhythmic" sine/cosine curve no?
Editors are expensive. Dang, had I known, I'd enroll myself in some multi-media school and earn the big bucks. So yea...prices to be down sounds like a good idea, too.
Funky Grad interview on 29 March
I know I promised an entry on this, so here we go (image-heavy post!) :
My favorite photo is actually this candid shot taken at Starbucks, while waiting for our interviewer, Richard to arrive. It's one of my "tou xiao" shots heehee... Mr. X used to take plenty of these. Looking at it, I now know why hurhur... Starbucks should consider me as their local endorser, no? *Lolx*
The three of us while being briefed on our interview. Evan was supposed to be here too, but he fell ill. Poor Mike only slept at 5AM the night before. My nose and fever were still running, it's been some unhealthy times for the iTalents. Perhaps the pressure is really building up. We really must take care and drink lotsa lotsa water and get plently of rest. My last temperature read 37.8! *yay!* It's coming down...*fingers crossed*
If you're wondering why we all looked so perturbed, it's because we'd just been told what we had to do for the interview! Oh my gosh...to think we all innocently thought it was some simple Q&As and that was it. Oh no...not at all!
Want to know what we 3 poor souls had to do for Funky Grad in the end? Watch out for my notice! Will post the link to the interview once it's up! *winkz*
Hope you peeps enjoyed the pics, rest time for me now. Hopefully I'll get to work in one piece tomorrow morning. Nights!
posted by Xinhui VaL on 01 April 2008 at 8:56 PM under interview, iTalentstar
Wrong time to be sick!
Am stuck at home now because someone collapsed when she got home at 10PM last night. That someone had her temperature measured - 38.5degrees. Not good...not good at all.
So...instead of running all over sunny Singapore today, I've been quarantined at home to do some editing and lotsa recuperating. Not to mention plenty of ice-packs and ice-showers in between.
Gosh, I've taken the full course of antibiotics, had enough panadols to last me a lifetime...why is this happening?!? Yes, I'm an official whiner now. I can't believe I took leave from work to be stuck at home with a thermometer in my mouth every other hour!
Thank goodness for the extension in deadlines - I've yet to finish shooting, I've yet to find a video editor, I've yet to a million other things...2 days of rushed-filming, and I'm a wreck already. This is bad.
Help, anyone?
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